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Wednesday
Mar172010

Expectation

We all have expectations.  We expect that we will get paid for the jobs we do.  We expect that people around us will obey traffic laws.  We expect that our friends will stand by us and our relationships will progress in a certain way.  But what happens when something we expect doesn't materialize?  In the case of traffic laws, people could get hurt or even killed.  But when an expectation of a friend or lover doesn't pan out, the hurt is internal, and the relationship itself could die.  Expectations by nature are internal.  When verbalized and communicated, an expectation becomes a shared agreement between two people or within a community.  Traffic laws could be viewed as an agreement that we all share with each other.  If we communicate with our partners what we want, then the internal expectation becomes an external agreement (or not).  Agreements can be negotiated, but expectations that are never put on the table  aren't negotiable because only one party knows about them.  And if it's a non-negotiable one-sided agreement, how can that be fair to the other?  Communicating our expectations now can prevent disappointment and frustration later. 

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